It is
generally a common knowledge that it is acceptable when people are being
utilised for their – emphasis on “their” as this is not just about women despite
the general views and cases – morphology such as face, hair, or physique for
example, advertising cosmetics, hair care, and fashion products. However, in
contrast it is greatly forbidden and frowned upon when instead people offering
others ”services” with their reproductive organs. The thing is, of people
falling into this category, they can be roughly divided into two subgroups;
first is the ones who were paid to do the service i.e. prostitutes. Second,
those who are willing to do it for free with certain friends but never involved
in romantic ways, or known as “Friends with Benefits”, will be referred as FnB
from here on, in several places.
Viewing those
two subgroups, it should be a reasonable to see them as no different because essentially,
utilising their reproductive organs for services is morally terrible and people
who did that should be condemned for that no matter what. But, there is this
everlasting perception that people consider still prostitutes as the worse of
the two. So why is that? In order to seek out a greater point of view regarding
this case, twelve interviewees were chosen and questioned for their opinions
regarding the topic in the span of two days between 8th to 9th
September, 2018.
The responses
from the interviewees generally had the same points of views bar one. Nine of
them commonly do agree that there are more negative views upon the prostitutes
because of several aspects. First, they were seen as lower due to publicly
declaring and promoting themselves that they would do “services” to be paid,
thus they could be fully exposed to all sorts of people around for what they
are doing. Second, prostitutes should have longer histories of getting into
moments with greater number of patrons of various backgrounds, so surely the
risks of getting sexually-transmitted diseases (STD) goes higher, especially
considering the third aspect, that there often are no fundamentally mutual feelings
between the prostitutes and their momentary partners, who the former see the
other as only patrons and the latter whom views the prostitutes as nothing more
than service-providers. This led to prostitutes may be hiding the facts that
they had been transmitted STDs historically so they can still perform services
for a living, thus risking their patrons with the diseases. Additionally,
prostitutions are considered to be illegal in many countries and yet they still
prevail undetected in more-secluded sections of the public, and thus people see
them both as practicioners of morally forbidden activity as well as
law-breakers.
On the
contrary, the intervewees view the FnB as the lesser bad of the two for several
reasons. The first one is that they do not openly declare that they will do
sexual services to others and instead only with certain friends with mutual
trusts, so their actions are not publicly exposed. Related to the second and
third reasons for prostitutes, only the reverse, there should be lower risks of
STD transmissions due to both partakers should have known each other better so
that they should be sure that no infections will take place. Moreover, FnB
conduct their acts usually for the sake of themselves as a rather peculiar form
of social engagements to further strenghten their bonds simply as friends. It
is interesting to note that this behaviour.
It is
interesting to note that three of the interviewees have different views. The
first one, whom had experienced life in Australia, where it can be said
contemporary Western lifestyle, in which where the things discussed here often
take place, is present. The interviewee had been living for nearly 2 years in
Australia and had been knowing several Caucasian-descent friends with, of course,
more free way of living than an Indonesian due to their customs and and
environment. The interviewee told me during the interview that never she had
seen or heard first or second-hand accounts of free-sex occurrences, and came
to understanding and agreement that at least on where she was, people see
prostitutes and FnB as the same and both were equally condemned for their
actions. The second one has similar thoughts even without experiencing years of
living abroad. She argues that wherever religious and cultural values are
embraced upon by the public, people would by default go against both
prostitutions and FwB-stuffs for what they do is quite often premarital sexual
intercourses as well as one with person who is not the legal partner. In the
end, what they do are equally amoral in the eyes of public.
The third
interviewee with different perspective has a rather contrarian one, for in his
personal point of view, the risks of STD transmission should be equal, and that
the prostitutes should be one of the lesser “evil”. His arguments include the
fact that, disregarding norms and customs, prostitutes did provide services
commercially while in contrast, FwB do not. Further elaboration he had provided
is that with FwB, one may never knew wether he or she may have already been in
a romantic relationship or even married a legitimate and legal partner, which
if the relations with a friend is caught red-handed, will very likely stir
social issues such as partner-partner conflicts that may lead to break-ups,
divorces, and thus the inner circle (i.e. family and friends) of the partnered friends
with benefits thus may see the pair as disgraces and deny them acceptance.
Even so, the
interviewees do agree that no matter what, in essences the actions both
prostitutes and FnB took are nevertheless to be frowned upon, and in that
regards, it all goes back to every regions and whatever faiths or cultural
customs the people are following. The human society surely had been shaped by
the customs and cultures growing alongside with the species from the beginning
and it is nothing strange that getting involved on a sexual relations with ones
not the legitimate partner is a no-no, even in communities contemporary people
consider to be, less advanced. However, one could ask for him/herself, is all
the unspoken agreement that sexual intercourses with randoms is frowned upon have
something true on itself, or is it just a mask to hide a terrible truth?
R.A.S. (10615040)
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